Ok, avoiding bridezilla gets harder and harder the more the date approaches, and trust me it is not without reason.
First of, having to deal with rejection, you know all the people I hoped would be there that dont really know if they'll be able to make it(like its really not that important to them as it is to us) or simply say no with a lame (not to them obviously) excuse.
Its tough, specially when I find myself without an enthusiastic crowd to talk about our wedding plans, which is the case since only 1 friend (former collegue-not that close) is coming from Canada. I mean I understand that its a destination wedding in some sort (a small village in Mexico), but I didn't even blink when one of my very good friends invited me as her bridesmaid to her wedding in Puebla in October in 2008. And might I add that I confirmed my assistance and bought my airline ticket in march of that year, without knowing if I'd have vacations or a job-for that matter- in october...Oh! And I sacrificed spending christmas with my family in Mexico that year.
But that's just me, I guess not that many people would do that. As it turns out, the friend I'm talking about might not even come to my wedding...
So whenever I meet with my girlfriends here instead of getting all excited about my wedding and they're presence, I just feel uneasy about discussing the details, and as you might already imagine, there's not much enthusiasm, since I wouldn't want to make them feel bad about missing out.
So it sucks!
I wish my mother lived closer by, or for that matter, I wish I would be surrounded by my family and friends from Mexico, specially my bridesmaids, to feel more emotional support and have less emotional breakdowns.
Planning a wedding in another country, long distance, is incredibly complicated! In fact I'm not only planning our wedding day, no, its far more complex than that... I am actually helping people plan their vacations while attending our wedding, so I'm a sort of travel agent/bride, oh! and I also have to deal with hotel reservations, the bachelorette... actually 2 bachelorette parties, one in Montréal, and one in Mexico, and the rehearsal dinner. But that's not all, since we have about 16 foreign guests, we have to find a way to pick them up at the airport(did I mention we have no car in Mexico), show them around a bit, I mean after all they did make the effort to go that far, and then organize transportation for all of them to the wedding venue.
Maybe I am overdramatizing, I tend to do so sometimes, but honestly I feel A LOT of pressure right now, from all around.
The photographer cancelled on us last week, so I have to find a new one...
Decorations...
Mariachi...
Fireworks...
Invitations that haven't arrived to their destination
RSVPs before april 10th (we are already on the 6th of april)
Seating chart, once everyone confirms or declines
Placement cards
Menus
Photos of us for a slideshow
Photos of us for the decoration on the tables
Flowers (which type) and bouquet
Grooms suit, shirt, shoes, etc
Legal requisites to get married
Registry for wedding gifts
Etc...
I cant think of everything right now but I'm sure I'm missing something...
Oh! Like writting our own vows...
Y luego esta el otro lado de la moneda, el tener que decir NO, enemil veces a la gente que quiere venir acompañada y no puede, porque tenemos límite de espacio y de presupuesto.
Desde las que quieren traer a una amiga (what is the deal with going alone to a wedding if you already know 30% of the guests?!) y las que quieren traer al novio o a un date. Sorry, lo siento mucho pero no se puede. Cuantas veces lo he dicho hasta ahora... uff! its exhausting! And everytime I say it I feel bad, cuz I would love for everyone to be able to come with a date, but because we are the one's paying for the wedding - and trust me, its gonna drain our savings completely- then saying NO is the only option even if its not easy.
(and this are only the wedding related issues, I'm not even metioning tax payments and Computer problems that cost a fortune!)
Ok, I feel lighter already, I think Im gonna have some comfort food for dinner and watch some TV and try and relax.
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QUERIDA LOREN:
ReplyDeleteEn mi nueva vida a veces siento que no puedo más con el caos. Esto no significa que sea lo mismo que lidiar con un muladar", no, la cocina y mi recamara estan en orden y son "El cuarto internacional y el estudio "Esoterico", ademas de la carpintería de Juan y el ENORME patio que rodea la casa.
No estoy acostumbrada a una casa tan grande y tampoco a los kilos de polvo que hay en Jimenez.
HAy días en que quisiera resolverlo todo de un jalón y ordenar hasta caerme de cansancio!
Ahora que esta aqui Juan, me gustaría que el ordeara todo "rapido, rapido, rápido"
Pero asi como es Juan, me comparte muchas de las historias de los diferentes objetos bellos en su vida, desde una piel de jaguar que le regalo un chaman, hasta una piramide de cristal diminuta con torre Eiffel adentro.
Juan no se desespera...cremelo, nunca lo veo desesperado, es muy paciente.
Y me enseñado una de las lecciones de vida mas importantes: NO importa que tanto tengas que hacer, no olvides tu intencion en ese hacer (El para que) y no olvides gozar las pequeñas cosas de la vida...que al final son las que forman lo mejor del rompecabezas de la vida:
Como juntar kelites juntos en la huerta y kuego comerlos en casa con una salsa rica que el mismo hizo y era la que su mama hacía.
Como intentar un pan de nata nuevo. Como ir a nadar al ojo. La verdad fuimos ayer y ya me estaba volviendo loca de no poder nadar!!!!!Mucho del equilibrio de mis emociones depende del....Agua!!!!
DE manera que mi querida, hermosa y jovensisisma hija: Toma el tiempo para tener esos momentos de paz y gozo en la vida.
Y por favor dime y hasme saber en que mas podemos ayudar Juan y YO...que para eso estamos!!!
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Tu MOM